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- // no.11
- Alice M
- Mary & Lily
- Naomi C.
- Naomi N.
By Alice MI have never felt like I loved myself, even liked myself. Growing up, I was constantly picked apart by my mother telling me I was too big, too thin or that I looked like my male cousin (which as a pubescent girl wasn't something that I wanted to hear). Nothing was ever right.
When the world ground to a halt mid-March 2020, I had mixed feelings. Sure, the world was going into an (to use the word in every single email sent since March) “unprecedented” time and no one knew what was going to happen - but the chance to just… stop. Process. Ground myself. It wasn’t something I’d had much of a chance to do before. Doing nothing is something I actively avoid, and had more and more since September, when my father passed away. Watching your dad die in your early twenties is not something I’d wish on my worst enemy.
I am a 34-year-old freelancing, single mother to the most beautiful 3-year-old girl. I left an unhealthy relationship last year, and we have since managed to divorce amicably. My work has become a dream come true, working on storytelling, communications, illustration and photography for wonderful, small, sustainable brands.
By Becky StoneI have spent every day of my life, as far back as I can remember, wanting just one thing. To be thin. It would be the greatest thing that could ever happen to me. I would give up ten years of my life to just be thin and to never have to think about my body and why it wasn’t right, ever again. That was all I wanted.
By GözdeI always just stuck out somehow. I was the tallest girl in my class, probably the weirdest too. I'm an only child and I didn't have a normal family life either. My dad left when I was 4 and my mother's mental health problems inevitably meant I grew up in foster care, which was definitely soul-destroying.
By PaulaLike many people, I have felt the burden of perfection for most of my life. I was raised in a cult and we were taught to be on a constant quest for spiritual and emotional perfection. Oddly, physical perfection was discounted and we were strictly prohibited from wearing makeup, or dressing anything but modestly.
By Emilie Lavinia
Over the years I’ve had a complex relationship with my own body. Imagine feeling uncomfortable about something, then being in awe of it, then disliking it or hating the sight of it on some days but still, having to carry it with you or rather, having it carry you everywhere you’d go each and every day.
By Maïna Cissé
When Lily messaged me to feature in the anti-casting shoot she said: “I can write you a story about perfectionism and body hair if you fancy shooting a model with unshaved legs??”. To which I responded: “of course, looking forward to reading you”.